I'm dead tired, yet awake and not able to sleep. I can smell my steal cut Irish oatmeal cooking in the kitchen. The smell woke me up. It smells like the baby poop my little ones would make when they first started eating Cheerios. But since I was asleep, the smell confused me. I had to find it.
It’s 5am. This is so not cool.
The only other creature stirring is Pumpkin, our cat. I walk through my pitch black house. My room smells, the hallway does not. I go between the two and keep trying figure it out. Finally I figure out it’s the oatmeal. It took me getting out of my warm bed to figure it out. Yay, I'm awake.
Today I'm sure will be packed full of fun. Kids go to school. I go to traffic court.
I got two tickets this year. The first is taken care of with online comedy traffic school. Talk about boring. The second one, I feel like I was set up. Like the cops were out to get me? No, but on my way to work in September, I was the only driver on the road, and I suppose I paused at a stop sign instead of stopping. Cop follows me. In fact he follows me so closely I couldn't see his head lights in my rear view mirror, let alone whether he was an officer. I get nervous when followed so closely, so I drove a little faster. When I did, he flipped on his lights.
The "courtesy" notice was never sent to me. Being the responsible person I am, I go down to the court office to find out why. I find out it’s due in two days and I’m broke. The silver lining is my check is coming in. The clerk gives me the citation number, but when I go home to look it up, I can't access it on the website. They do maintenance on this site EVERY DAY. So I could not make the $280 payment.
Finally I get the bill, which includes a $300 fee just for fun. I had money for the $280 payment, but now I have to beg to waive the $300 fee. Wish me a miracle please! Do I get my kids shoes and lunches for school, or pay the city because… well, I guess because they are broke and my taxes aren't enough.
After court I get to go to work. The guy that closed my office last year is coming in. We are told we will be getting pizza. I'm sick thinking about that. Who is going to fly out from New Jersey for pizza? I'm sure he'll mention my office’s attendance record and slipping sales. Pep us up with some kind of phony motivational words, then the rumors will spread about how we have X amount of time to show them what we got or our heads will be on the chopping block.
Oh, corporate sales pressure, how I love you so. The comfort you give me with your security and humanity just fills me with joy… Did I mention I can't sleep? Thanks!
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