home business vs the job that's waiting

After having Declan I have been worried about affording daycare for everyone. Going back to work means that I pay for Marysa, Joey, Sonny and Declan's childcare bills. For Sonny and Declan it also mean buying extra diapers for those daycare's and Declan will need bottles and food brought for him as well. Before I went on leave I was paying for Marysa and Sonny. Joey my friend was watching and now she's in school full time. My estimate for day care is roughly a lovely grand total of about $3000 a month. I make $3800. Doesn't leave a lot for food, utilities, any fun at all but benefits are included. I wont ever get to see my kids. I have always wanted to raise my own kids instead of paying someone else to do it. While I was out I thought about opening my own daycare. I wont get paid nearly as much as I would holding on to my job but my expenses would drop way down to food, utilities and fun.

My mom had a daycare when I was growing up. I loved coming home to my mom and all the babies. I loved sitting on the sofa and talking to a baby and watching those cute gestures. I loved my mom was there is I wasn't feeling good and I needed my bed to be made and a cup of soup. I loved the songs and the toys and all the noise.

Having five kids of my own I still love those things but the noise at times can get out of control. I never have enough time to do everything. My house is marginally clean most the time if all the toys get put away. Keeping up dishes, counters and floors is hard when you're helping with homework, nursing a baby, making dinner, vacuuming and trying to do home schooling for your self. Not to forget the surprises, leprechaun traps, ER visits, potty accidents, play dates and just needed an hour at the park to burn off energy. I think I stay on top of things alright, marginal but what about when I have other people kids to watch. A few more butts to clean, boo-boos to prevent, mouths to feed, and adults in addition to my own to deal with. At least when I tell my other adult what kind of day I had he may be OK with the dishes still in the sink but my mom never had dishes in the sink, or at least not more than a few. She would get up an hour sometimes more before the daycare opened and go to the Grocery store for milk and bread or mop the kitchen floor. She really was and still is Super Mom. Even though she tells me I'm a better mom than she ever was. I'm sure that's a white lie to keep me motivated to keep trying to do the best I can.

I'm going to open that daycare. My kids at least need to see that I tried to stay home with them. To love them better than the teachers at the YMCA did. Who knows maybe one day I will compare to my mom and inherit the title of Super Mom.

Monday the Childcare Council is coming by before I mail my application in to see if my house might pass the states inspection. I really hope it does...... in the mean time a few extra prayers and good thoughts and hope sent my way wouldn't hurt.

oh Joey ........

You got to love Joey. He has to write about his mom as a kids. He decided when she had pin worms was a good story. I'm not positive that's the best idea he's had. After all I'm his mom.

My three older kids are all so different.

Yesterday was an interesting ride home to say the least. I pick up Joey from school first, he gets to the car in a clod of dirt much like Pigpen from Charlie Brown with an over stuffed backpack. "What's in the back pack Joe?" his response is always nothing, so I probe with where is your lunch box and jacket? "Oh in my backpack."The backpack is huge there has to be more in there.
Second we pick up Marysa. She remembers to wait at the top of the park next to her school. She's standing up there nervous maybe I for got her. Our eyes connect and a since of relief sweeps across her face. He gets in the car and starts crying because she has to sit in the middle row of my van. I have her and Joe switch and peace is restored.
My van isn't so big. My vacuum went out this week so instead of picking up Tanner right away we go pick up the vacuum and drop it off at the service center. The man in the shop shows me that there are 5 of my exact vacuum sitting in a line waiting on repair. So did I get a bad vacuum? But the new is I can pick it up 2 to 3 days. Oh yeah I get gross carpet even longer. YUCK!
Sonny had been calm up to this point really needed to run. I usually get a iced tea about 3ish so we stopped at a McDonald's with a playground. I got Diet Coke since they were out of iced tea and Sweet tea is like ipecac syrup to me. It tickles my gag reflex. I visited with my favorite wheeled chaired friend, this guy I'm not sure what happened but I've seen him at McDonald's for years. He always tells me my kids are going to be 7'1" and wants to know if hey can take a ride on his wheel chair. I think he only likes babies. Declan seems to like him too, flashing him his gummy grins and laughing out loud. The kids play about 30 minutes some kind of tag in the tubes games.
Then we were on our way to pick up Tanner. Marysa is in the back seat and asks if we can change the music. Why? Well it said the word sex in it. I'm trying to let Marysa know sex is not a bad word. It can mean the sex of a person, Male or Female, or something shared between two people who are grown up and in love. She then spits out.."have you had sex Mom?" I'm frozen. This is coming out of the mouth of my little girl who just 3 months earlier witness her baby brother being born. I told her yes that is how babies are made. She got really quiet so I waited a minute and ask if she's OK and if there is anything else. She tells me nope and starts a fight with Joe. We finally get to Tanner's school. I tell Sarah I need Tanner and she calls for her on the 2-way radio. She then tells me I need to sign out Tanner in some book and on the computer daily. Holy Cow what next a finger print and blood sample? The daycare is way to computer ran for me. What happened to people taking care of kids? Tan comes running and we do our sprint back to the car. She's talking to me about something the whole run and I couldn't hear a word. At the car I ask what she was talking about and got her sweet smile and the "Uh I don't remember."
At home the kids are in full swing already to play. I have Marysa and Joe give me the papers that get sent home to parents. Joey is hovering over his back pack looking for his Math test scores and field trip permission slip. I want to see what else is in the giant back pack. OMG........... he has an entire bolt of paper, each sheet wadded up piece by piece. How is that for a backpack with nothing in it?

The Busy Bees Mom's group

Well I feel as if I am getting good at stepping out side my anti-social box. Like I'm anti-social. However I have been at the same job for nine years with the same friends doing the same things. Until I met Warren......and things started to change. I added new friends to my circle, did new organized activities with my kids, had to find daycare for 4 little people and learn how to organize a play date. Well I have failed or at least struggled with a few of these key points in my new life style. My kids beg me for play dates and arranging one seems to be a full time job. So I decided today to RSVP yes to a play date in the park with the Busy Bee's mom group. I recognized one of the women from Facebook and introduced myself. My Sonny bun was not much older that her little princess. They played nicely, thank heavens, and I had a chance to talk about potty training and eating challenges and childhood injuries.Other mom's and kids showed up, my typical nervous word vomit died down quickly with these women. ODD! and I was able just to have a good time. If only soccer mom's were so easy to get along with. I still need to learn to get to know the older child's parent. Ugh!